Oh, the lure of reality TV…
Not sure if it’s the get-rich-quick/overnight success mentality or just the chance to get on TV, but my Lord it’s unbelievable how many people turn out for these things. Droves. Tens of thousands of wannabes — many of them actually really good vocalists — stood in line with Pep and me today…
I’ve said from the start that the whole idea of Idol isn’t really my bag. Sure I’m a singer. But my bigger strengths — like writing, producing, and playing guitar — automatically get swept under the rug in favor of a “format.”
“It’s a look,” they said today. “A package. We’re trying to beat last year’s talent.”
The alarm clock buzzed again at 4am, and I subconsciously hit the snooze a couple of times before I remembered what day it was. We grabbed our pre-packed lunches and protein bars and hopped in the car 2 hours before sunrise and sped to the Rose Bowl in Pasadena, where we proceeded to join the cast of thousands of hopefuls already in line. (5:30 am)
After 2 hours, the sun started to come up, and we had moved a good 20 feet or so.
We had done this before, but Sunday everybody was a little less serious and we had a lot more fun standing around. Plus my new friend Ryan brought a guitar and we had a glorious time trying to remember Gavin Degraw song lyrics at 6am.
With wristbands intact and stadium assigned seats procured, we finally got through the gates about 9am, and the boom cameras rolled, taking shot after cheesy shot of a falsely hyped-up crowd pretending to be ecstatic to be there. (Side note: it’s damn hard to act energetic when you’ve been on your feet for 5 hours straight with the August sun beating down on you.)
More time ticks by… Some people are singing. Some are blabbering about how great they are and how they shouldn’t even have to try out. One guy proclaimed he could have easily been in the top 5 finalists. It’s just that his voice got a little dry when he first auditioned… riiight…
So we sat and sat, in cramped little Rose Bowl stadium seats built for skinny short people, baking in the Southern California sun until about 1 PM, when they finally called our number. I stood in a group of 4 pretty darn good singers, complete with catchy outfits and good looks to match.
We each took our turn in front of a junior producer at one of 14 booths lined up on the opposite side of the stadium, trying to sing loud enough to wow the judge over the neighboring booths.
The game is, you sing one at a time and then at the end they let us know which one(s) they keep. Last to go, I was wowed at some of my competitors and a bit nervous actually. (Don’t you get past the butterflies…ever?)
I belted out Amazing Grace to the best of my ability. Complete with bluesy slides in my own unique arrangement I’d never heard anyone do before, sure that they’d appreciate my throwback to Otis Redding and Sam Cooke.
Nobody got through. I’m telling you, this junior producer was a brick wall.
They were not letting anyone through. It was unbelievable.
I got told by some of the contestants that I sounded incredible during my tryout. The lady we saw said none of my group of 4 had the “strong voice” they were looking for this year. I’m pretty sure “strong voice” means big boobs, because right after that I saw some scantily-clad beauty queen with the voice of a parrot get one of the coveted golden tickets to the next round (so maybe voice isn’t everything).
But I am not bitter. I had fun and met some very talented people. And got one sweet farmer’s tan sunburn.
All is not lost though. Our boy who so proudly told us about his singing talent didn’t even get past the first round.
Beat that Taylor Hicks. 
